A Short and Sweet Quote

It is not what you do for your children but what you have taught them to do for themselves that will make them successful human beings.--Ann Landers

Especially if they insist on it! ("Me do it mommy!")


What is your favorite quote? Leave a comment!

Can Metal Bowls Touch Your Soul?

I went to visit another Montessori school in the next county (where we will be buying a house in a few months) to observe their toddler classroom for my son. I loved it: the environment was spacious, lots of light, many lovely activities, little wooden stools and low tables, a painting easel, green plants, and a squeaky Ginnie pig; what one would expect in a toddler Montessori class.

It was time to go outside and see the playground, and it was for toddlers only (they play separate from the preschoolers--another plus!). I looked around the corner and saw rows of metal bowls stuck to a red and yellow painted board. "What on earth is that?" I asked the teacher.

The toddler teacher explained: "The kids used to bang their little plastic hammers on the building, and I thought, if they want to bang, let's give them something to bang on!"

She contacted a local environmental sculpture artist friend, and he made them a bowl sculpture!

But wait... If this a Montessori environment, shouldn't they be in order of largest to smallest or something--if you look again at the picture, they look all out of order (and you are probably wondering why). The artist ordered the metal bowls on the board according to their musical scale!

I was so touched by this I was ready to start by son the very next day! This teacher (with over 30 years experience BTW) was able to observe the behavior of her tots, and find a better solution to their need to bang; and who would think of screwing rows of metal bowls on a board, in order of their musical sound! It truly melted my soul!

I'm happy to say, my son is enrolled in his new class, and although it is a half hour commute (until we move), it is well worth it just for those shiny bowls! (OK, and the cute little fur ball of a Ginnie pig!)

How has Montessori touched YOUR soul? Leave your comment!

Montessori-friendly Curriculum

I get asked a lot about creating a Montessori-friendly curriculum... What should you be looking for? Here's my answer in a nutshell!

It can be an overwhelming process, choosing between so many activities to buy and or make!

First, shy away from all the matching sets of cards out there, you have to laminate them, and then the children never choose them, they are boring! Trust me, you will see a lot of them and it will be tempting to buy, as they are less expensive.

Books and puzzles with matching subjects are a good bet. For example, in our outside classroom we had an insect puzzle that taught the parts of an ant, we then traced the puzzle pieces to make a ditto they could color; older children could write the names of the parts of an ant, or cut it out; you can also get an ant farm. Then get a book on ants!

For study of the body those mannequins are great: a body that is a three dimensional puzzle, with parts. You can then make labels for it, get books and puzzles on the human body...

Math
The Golden Beads can be substituted with ones made of wood, and now they make them in blue plastic.

Color beads (from 1-9) are great to have, too, for teaching teens, addition snake game, and subtraction snake game. You can make your own math boards, if you have time (teens, tens, and memorization boards that is, addition and subtraction strip boards might be harder to make).

Science
Go with making your own science experiments, but if you find some pre made, that is great, like a volcano that erupts, for example. Stay away from the matching cards, again! Boring. Get science picture books, instead! And do those experiments!

Order earthworms (or dig up your own), a butterfly garden (where you get the caterpillars that make cocoons); tadpoles; bean seeds are fun to plant in cotton and watch the roots grow.

Language
Language games are fun, watch out for upper case (you want words written in lower case)! If your child is reading, the best bets are easy reader books like Bob Books, and phonic work books like Primary Phonics, and lined paper for writing.

That's should be enough to get any "Montessori mom" started!

But above all, bring your own passions to the table! Your love of art, or language, or science, or nature, or music, or crafts. Your child will find their own passions, but if you start with your own interests, it will motivate you to create Montessori activities at home, and have fun with it!

What's Up With Montessori and Fantasy Play?!

Alex was three when she started our Montessori school, many years ago. Her mom was a baker and had her own bake shop in town. Alex pretended to bake with everything and anything at school, as would be expected. But at the same time, she had to do the materials correctly, for one important reason, the other kids noticed when he did not! They would go up to her and say, "Alex, you are not supposed to do that with the pink tower!"

You might think it was the teachers who got upset about Alex's behavior. No, it was the children, as they are so sensitive to order! They are like little policemen in the classroom!

It was at this time we were creating our outdoor classroom. We had a sandbox and we made sand toy works for Alex (and the other children). We got a few dishpans, placed pots, pans, bowls and wooden spoons in each of them, and they became outside works. The rule, of course, was to put the work away when they were finished. And it was not a banging work, a throwing work, etc.

Alex never left the sandbox!

She also loved worms, and we had a giant compost in the yard. As one of our outside works, we had child-size work gloves and shovels for digging, or turning, the compost. Alex loved it! And when she found worms, it was like someone finding gold!

One of the most powerful learning tools for a teacher, and mom, is to observe the child. Especially when they "fantasy play." From their behavior, you can get ideas for activities to make, that lead them to constructive play.

Let me give an example. On our practical life shelf we had a stove work. My director found it in a shop, it was a little stovetop made of wood with little knobs on the front; and it was small enough to fit on a rug or table top. However, the stove was hard for the children to carry, so we put drawer handles on each side of it.

On top of the stove was a plastic container with two small pots and a small metal scupper. Inside one of the metal pots was some large pasta for scooping. The stove is a practical life work. A child can take the stove off the shelf, bring it to a rug, take out the pots, place them on top of the stove, take the lids off, and scoop the pasta from one pot to the next (it was a spooning work!).

The younger children loved this work! But it is only for scooping and spooning. They can pretend to make soup, boil eggs, etc., as long as they do the work correctly (they don't throw the pasta, they don't bang the lids together, or mix it with another work). Because who would notice such a breech? The other children!

Fantasy play in young children, I have observed over the years, is about mimicking the adults. The problem I see is there is no beginning, middle, or end. There are no clear limits or boundaries. Children at such a young age (ages 2 to 5) need limits and boundaries, they demand it without knowing they demand it.

With a play stove you can create an activity with a beginning, a middle, and an end. You can create limits and boundaries. The child then becomes independent within the boundaries and limits of the activity. He is free to choose the activity, to repeat the activity, as long as he does it within the boundaries and limits of the activity...

Each activity in the Montessori environment needs limits and boundaries: a beginning, a middle, and an end.

The stove we made into a practical life activity had the boundaries of the stove top itself, and the rug; it had limits (we only scoop and spoon back and forth). It had a beginning: the child gets out the work and places the two pots on the stove; a middle: the child scoops back and forth as many times as he wishes; and an end: the child puts the pots and scupper back in the container and the container back on the stove and the stove back on the shelf.

Children of this age relish order and routine. Make (or remake) your home activities with this in mind!

Maria Montessori Would Turn Over In Her Grave!

A few years ago, I was asked the "traditional Montessori" question from a new Montessori mom. She heard the following comment at the Institute for the Achievement of Human Potential in Philadelphia, PA:

"Maria Montessori would turn over in her grave if she knew what some of the schools bearing her name were doing."

She then told me: "I do not know what they were referring to, but I highly respect their work, so I want to stick to traditional Montessori methods... I would like to hear your views on this subject given your extended experience."

Here is my view: I think Maria Montessori would turn over in her grave if she knew what traditional Montessori schools were NOT doing!

Let me back up.

I was trained by a Montessori headmistress who was Internationally trained in London, and after my training, I was at a Montessori school for 20 years whose director was American Montessori trained.

Over the years, we had many children who had behavioral problems, learning disabilities, and or were just "a challenge" to teach... (We accepted some of the most difficult children in the county! And those were the children who, in the end, taught us the most!)

We had a choice, kick those children out of the school because they did not "fit in" to the traditional, purist style of our Montessori classroom, or make modifications so these challenging children could stay and learn, but more importantly, love learning.

The school, thus, became a progressive Montessori school.

Forward to the present.

When I had a son with Down syndrome in 2004, I was faced with the following question: would he be accepted in a Montessori school? would he fit in?

So I went about observing (visiting) the Montessori schools in my area for a toddler program for my son. Two of those schools were traditional International Montessori schools, and one was an American Montessori school, and progressive.

The traditional International Montessori schools were the most expensive, had little or no cultural diversity, and I saw right away that my son would not fit in: the expectations and standards of the classrooms were too high for him due to his special needs.

The third school, an American Montessori school, was much more affordable, had lots of diverse students, and after observing, I saw right away that my son would be a great match, that he would have some "wiggle room" and not stand out among the typically developing toddlers. (And as Montessori trained teacher, I knew right away that this Montessori school was "authentic": they had all the materials you would find in any certified American Montessori school, with Montessori trained teachers, but they had a progressive approach.

The director agreed with me, that a Montessori classroom's activities can be modified to fit the needs of the children (special, difficult, or just different) and not the other way around. And it became a wonderful Montessori school for my son, who welcomed him with open arms, regardless of his "limitations" due to his Down syndrome.

Maria Montessori designed her materials with the help of her observations of the children of her time, and she would expect us to do the same, especially for special needs children, who were her biggest influence!

So keep an open mind and don't be afraid of going down a different path, a path that is sometimes chosen for you, as mine was when I had a special needs son. For most, a traditional Montessori path is fine, but for others, it is not.

Angel Wings

I sit at my slow computer deleting e-mails I won't have time to read today, including one from my Down syndrome support group with the subject heading "New Testing for DS."

As a mother of a toddler with DS, I get asked the Did you get tested? question frequently, for which I reply, No, I didn't. And sometimes I get asked, What would you have done if the test was positive for Down syndrome? for which I reply, I honestly don't know. And if someone were to ask me what I thought of this new, early-detection test for Down syndrome, I'd reply, I have to think about it.

As I shut my computer down, I try to imagine what other tests scientists will come up with for already anxious moms-in-waiting and I try to add a little humor to the idea:

Announcing the Terrible Two Test! Scientists have discovered a way to inform pregnant women if their unborn child will become terrible at the age of two, giving them advance warning if they test positive, or great relief if they test negative... I laughed at the thought.

It so happens I have a terrible two-year old, and I know the term is a cliché, but honestly, is there any other way to describe your own toddler? Tantrum thrower (wait, that's a cliché, too); I'm the boss of you now; pick up garbage off the playground eater; cup of spinach tosser; swatter of mommy's hand when she is trying to cross a busy street; and pull my diaper off pisser of carpets.

Before my son turned two I promised myself I would NEVER call him a terrible two-year old, and instead call him a terrific two-year old. Well, he is a terrific two-year old who acts terrible....

One night when my terrific-terrible tot was getting his diaper changed and fussing up a storm that warranted ear plugs for the neighbors, my husband peeks his head in the door way and with the humor that I married him for, says, Do I hear the sound of angel wings flapping? I laugh in an instant and my son stops wailing and starts giggling along with me: my husband managed to turn an unpleasant moment into a family gem that still makes us smile today.

But what does this have to do with testing for Down syndrome? Nothing except the ability to discover light camouflaged in darkness, like the 4 AM call I got from the hospice nurse who phoned to say my mother just took her last breath when I was two-and-a-half months pregnant with her first grandchild. In the five weeks that she was in hospice, I could not and did not get tested, and later that year I gave birth to an eight pound, twelve ounce strawberry blonde headed baby after 36 hours of labor and an emergency C-section.

The sorrowful loss of my mother during my window of time for a Down syndrome test guaranteed me a blissful yet bittersweet pregnancy and the birth of my special son because I did not face any soul tormenting decision.

So now the computer is off for the rest of the day, and I am out the door to pick up my son from daycare, a short distance away. As I enter the hallway to his classroom, I hear the familiar fussing and wailing noises coming from my toddler, and I smile as I whisper to myself, Do I hear the sound of angel wings flapping?

Did I mention he looks a lot like my mother?